Episode Transcript
Peter B: [00:00:00] So, they just released the second season of Tour de France Unchained on Netflix, like last week. And here we go again, Amanda. Despite there being absolutely no evidence of doping during last year's race, I watched the whole race. I know there was no doping. The trailer teases scandals on doping that went on and has a clip of one rider being asked if they think he was doping, referring to like, one of the leaders of the race during the time.
Look, the Tour de France, and cycling in general, like, no stranger to doping controversy, I totally get it. But, I'm going on record, nothing went on last year. It's almost impossible to slip that by nowadays. You gotta watch the series to find out. It's awesome, it's so intense, it's so addictive, and it totally explains the rules and strategies of the race, and would help anyone learn to love the tour.
Amanda: So do I need to watch the series before the actual Tour de France happens this coming weekend?
Peter B: No, because we're going to do this podcast right now and we're going to get super smart on the Tour de France.
Amanda: Okay, fine then. But what does the tour then have to do with [00:01:00] being more cultured and curious?
Peter B: What doesn't it have to do with it? I mean, it showcases the history and heritage of France, the center of all culture. While there's an intense bike race happening to go on in the background.
And if you pay attention, instead of falling asleep, you gain insight into the local tradition, like the French cuisine. And the whole beauty of France's landscape on full display, making it, in my opinion, one of the funnest ways to explore European culture and geography. So bam.
Amanda: I mean, if you say so, you're going to have to convince me of this. Here we go.
Peter B: Challenge accepted.
Hey everyone, welcome to sort of sophisticated, a podcast rooted in becoming more cultured and curious where we endeavor to suspend judgment, expand our worldview, and learn to appreciate varying perspectives and values,
Amanda: but really it's a show where we hope to enlighten anyone who cares on topics that might make them more interesting and well versed humans and just dangerous enough to hold their own in this sophisticated world, sort of.
Peter B: [00:02:00] And today we're diving into the Tour de France, the most grueling and prestigious bike race in the world. Testing cyclists endurance, skill, and tolerance for bad road rash people. Whether you're a diehard cycling fan or just here for the crashes and the fashion faux pas, we've got something for everyone.
So grab your bike, put on your helmet, and get ready to pedal through three weeks of scenic French countryside. And remember folks, in the Tour de France, it's not just about the journey or the destination. It's all about the chafing. And our word of the day is obstreperous. Our challenge is to work this word into the podcast somewhere and make it seem like, well, we meant to.
Amanda: And you're going to give a definition, right?
Peter B: Uh, I'm going to have to. I had to look this one up. Obstreperous.
Amanda: I'm sorry, what?
Peter B: Obstreperous.
Amanda: Okay.
Peter B: Yes. It's an adjective which means noisy, stubborn, or difficult to control.
Amanda: So, you.
Peter B: Uh, n no, no, no, no.
Amanda: I mean, how about this? My co host, P, can sometimes be pretty [00:03:00] obstreperous.
Peter B: How about, no, that doesn't count. Find a better one.
Amanda: Okay, fine. I'll try. But also, the Tour de France goes on for three weeks?
Peter B: Uh, yeah, three weeks. Oh. Yeah, 23 days. We're gonna get all in on it. Oh my gosh.
Amanda: Alright, alright, P, then. I know. So lay it on me. Gimme the history of the Tour de France. It's a big for, you know, those of us that have no idea what's going on here.
Peter B: It's a big commitment. I know, I know. But I'm gonna con you, I'm going to convince you to come over the dark side by the end of this episode,
Amanda: okay? I mean, you did with cricket. So here we go.
Peter B: I know
Amanda: I'm watching the T 20.
Peter B: It's amazing. Alright, anyway, history of le Tour. We're gonna do this fast. All right. So once upon a time, like during the turn of the century, um, 1903, to be exact, I wanna get it right.
A French newspaper called Lato.
So, for us, it's le auto, but like, in France, they say la te.
Amanda: In France, you mean in French? In French, they say? That's right,
Peter B: in France, in French, and all that, yeah. So they were totally desperate for circulation and may [00:04:00] have been suffering from a little summer boredom because nothing was going on in summers back in France, I guess, in 1903. So they concoct this little scheme that who would have guessed left cyclists cursing for almost 125 years now.
And that, Amanda, is how the Tour de France was born.
Amanda: So wait. What just happened? A newspaper started the Tour de France?
Peter B: Yep, totally. It was a marketing ploy to boost numbers, period. Two dudes who worked at the paper, one was the editor, the other dude was a writer, Henry and Gio, they came up with the idea to run a super long race over summer to write about it every day so more people would buy their paper in 1903.
Amanda: I mean, it's kind of genius, but also insane.
Peter B: I can't even believe people, like, signed up to do it.
Amanda: Right. That they got on board with it?
Peter B: Yeah, yeah. So anyway, it started with this, uh, group of riders with those big ass cool mustaches that twirl at the end, and they were all wearing, like, these really thick wool jerseys, you have to go back and see, like, old pictures, they were like, they were like sweaters, man, and they were, like, pedaling the shit out of these rickety little bikes that they had at the time.
It was crazy.
Amanda: [00:05:00] Wait. Wait. Why the wool? It's like summer.
Peter B: Right. Well, I don't know. I think they didn't have, like, the technology that we have. Like, the really expensive, like, good wicking shit that we have. Cause, you know, wool wicks. Oh, wool wicks, baby. Oh. No?
Amanda: It's so hot. Oh, but it's a wick.
Peter B: It's all about wicking.
Okay. So, anyway. They have to ride basically, like, 1, 500 miles back then. Right.
Amanda: And for all of our European friends 2, 500 kilometers.
Peter B: Thank you very much my math major Over like cobblestones and like just total chaos in general not to mention like mountains rivers valleys Everything in between right?
This isn't like paved roads yet And you want to know what the prize money was for the first winner back then? Take a guess
Amanda: a hundred dollars,
Peter B: uh No, it's france. So it's not uh, it's not dollars. It's
Amanda: well the equivalency thereof.
Peter B: It's francs Uh, okay, and it was a measly 20 francs francs. Is that how you said
Amanda: francs? So how much would that be in u. s?
Peter B: Dollars like like like 22? No, it's [00:06:00] nothing. Okay, it's not okay like
Amanda: in today's dollars
Peter B: Oh, like in today's okay. Yeah. Like, like $750. Like, like not a lot of dollars.
Amanda: And you have to ride 1500 miles,
Peter B: right? To get seven 50 miles. Not worth it.
Amanda: Right? Not even get it. A chance to get it. Not, Nope. Nope. Not worth it.
Peter B: So that's like 50 cents a mile. Fuck that. Like I wouldn't do that. Okay, okay, can I keep going? Yeah,
Amanda: yeah, but hold on, in a minute. I have another question.
Peter B: What, what, what?
Amanda: So, they had to ride 1, 500 miles without stopping. How did they potty?
Peter B: Um, good question. Okay, wait, I'm answering the first question first. The first race was ridden over six stages, or like six days
with each stage being somewhere between like 200 and 300 miles per day.
Amanda: That's a lot. Like, 8 hours of riding a day? Holy shit.
Peter B: Yeah, it's like a lot. Like, 15 hours of riding a day, it was a lot. Like, sunup to sundown, , it was crazy.
Amanda: And you don't stop.
Peter B: Yeah, and, so, answer question two, there were actually a few ways to go potty.
Believe it or [00:07:00] not. So the we're gonna get all super sophisticated here The first is they kind of all stop together as a group and pee by the side of the road like in a line
But it's always men, right?
Yes, it's all yeah. Okay. I mean there's now a Tour de France for women and so I don't ask me those questions, but like yes men line up side of the road.
Amanda: Okay that that tracks
Peter B: Yeah, yeah, right totally tracks,
Amanda: but wouldn't someone be able to use that to their advantage then and like not stop? And then they would be ahead of the pack?
Peter B: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I guess, but , yeah, I'll explain it later, but like, one rider would have like zero chance against a group of like 180 or so chasing him.
Cause he'd be caught in like five minutes.
Amanda: How?
Peter B: Like, okay, wait, I'll explain more in a minute. I have to get back to the potty thing first. You're firing like a ton of questions at me.
Amanda: Sorry.
Peter B: It's fine.
Amanda: I'm really
Peter B: interested. I'll get it all.
Amanda: And I don't know anything.
Peter B: Okay, so I promise. Okay, so potty. Okay, so the second way to go potty.
If no one's stopping, you just stop on the side of the road, get off the bike, and pee, and then catch up with everyone else. So it's sort of the opposite of what you were saying before. It's like, now you're [00:08:00] behind, everybody else went on without you, and they gotta like pedal your ass off to catch up.
Amanda: I mean, it seems pretty simple.
Peter B: Right, so far so good. And then finally, if you're racing just hard, this is my favorite one, just go on the bike, dude. Mid race. And a lot of times, if you watch closely, you'll see another teammate, like, with his hand on the back of his buddy, sort of pushing him along while he's going potty. Right next to him.
Amanda: Huh? I don't know how I feel about that.
Peter B: Yeah, I know. Okay.
Amanda: Mm-Hmm. . I mean, I guess I never thought about just going,
Peter B: but there you go. Those are, those are the three ways they go.
Hmm. Yeah. But how do they do number two?
Uh, is this what you really think our listeners wanna know about the tour of France? How do they do number
Amanda: 100%?
Peter B: Uh,
Amanda: lay it on me. There has to be some good.
Peter B: Okay. It's not that glamorous. It really isn't. They just stop and they find a ditch or a tree or something and go right there and I have absolutely seen it on television.
Amanda: Huh. Mm hmm. But those are the ones who probably lose the race. Like, they should have did their pre game poop.
Peter B: No. Okay, so back to your, like, original thing there. Look, uh, you, you have to understand, like, anybody can catch anyone at any time if they really want to. [00:09:00] Like, they can make up a few minutes, like, nothing. It's, like, super easy. It's all physics.
Amanda: But then the whole race is meaningless. It's meaningless. Like, if anyone can catch up at any time, seriously, this is so dumb.
Peter B: You're killing me. Okay, I don't mean like anyone can win at any time. I mean like, the stages are so long, like they're 100 miles each, that like, in any given day, anyone can make up an amount of time with a short burst of speed. That doesn't mean they can win the whole Tour de France over 21 days. It just means like, at any time, they can decide to use more energy.
Amanda: Okay.
Peter B: And catch up. Sure. It's, it's, it's that simple.
Amanda: Okay.
Peter B: You with me?
Amanda: I guess so.
Peter B: Okay. Let's go. Um, do you have any more inappropriate questions or can I just keep going?
Amanda: Okay, sorry. It was kind of super important stuff
Peter B: Was it really though?
Amanda: Everyone was wondering.
Peter B: Okay. I got one more though because you want to know something even weirder than all this?
Of course I do. It's still potty stuff. Right. If the riders go to the bathroom within the view of the public watching the race And mind you, there's about 12 million spectators. I checked that
Amanda: in person,
Peter B: in person, if they, if they go to the bathroom with in view of one of the 12 million [00:10:00] spectators, they get fined for public indecency by the race commissioners for urinating in public.
It's unbelievable. It's totally lame. What the hell?
Amanda: Yeah, no, yes, they should get in trouble for flashing themselves.
Peter B: People know what they're doing at the race. Like, you sign up to, like, if you're a spectator, you're going. That's what you're going to do. And then these guys have to figure out, like, where to go pee.
In everything they're racing, they still have to figure out where to go pee so they don't get fined. I think it's the dumbest thing ever. And especially, what if you're a shy peer, like me? I'd freak out. I wouldn't even know what to do.
Amanda: Then you wouldn't get a ticket.
Peter B: I wouldn't pee and my bladder would explode and I would die somewhere during the bike.
I probably would. That would be very hard to do though as I'm rotating the pedals. Okay, so back to some real history. God, that was a lot. Okay, so over the years the race evolved from like this, who gives a shit about the money race? With some highly suspect characters, if I may say so, maybe some prisoners and criminals, because who the hell would have signed up for this thing in 1903 to this massive global spectacle where winning is everything.
And a gazillion people tune in to show up and have a huge watch party. [00:11:00]
Amanda: Do they still wear wool jerseys?
Peter B: No more wool jerseys. 19th century. They swapped out wool for Lycra years ago, but the essence of the race, like the climbs, the cobblestones, the flat stages. And even the occasional collision with a cow are still there in all their glory.
Amanda: Hey, but but pete
Peter B: what
Amanda: They had cobblestones? They had cobblestones.
Peter B: Yeah, cobblestones everywhere.
Amanda: I mean that's got to be pretty obstreperous, doesn't it?
Peter B: Oh my god, you did that?
Amanda: Those bikes would be pretty noisy and hard to control over Cobblestones.
Peter B: I think you did that. Does that count? I don't know if you used the word properly But I'm gonna give this one because that was amazing that you just pulled that out noisy and hard to control.
What was it? What was it? Yeah, okay. I'll take it Okay, good. All right. Okay. Anyway, Miss Obstreperous, um, if you watch, which you better do after this episode, it is totally amazing.
So you have a bunch of teams now, basically made up of a core group from individual [00:12:00] countries, with some extras thrown in. So there's like a German team of four or five riders, and then they like have a few guys from different countries on their team, like specialists that they're looking for.
And then there's sort of like a team from England, or a team from Belgium. Like, not exactly or totally, but like there's a core group. together, right?
Amanda: So you don't have to be German to get on the German team.
Peter B: You do not. No, no, no. You do not. But, but there's generally a core of similar nationalism there. Anyway. Um, and they use these totally complicated team strategies and even a bunch of cars behind the race each day throwing free shit to the crowd like a parade on steroids or something.
Amanda: So they're literally just driving down, throwing stuff out their windows.
Peter B: Yeah, the guys in the back, well, they have like the mechanics and everybody in the back of the race first, and then behind that are the people, like, it's, I don't know what it's called, the something wagon, I don't know. They throw prizes.
Because how are you supposed to keep 12 million spectators interested when you spend all day waiting for the race to come by when it does? They fly by you at like 50 miles an hour or something and they're gone in like literally eight seconds. You need free shit for sure
Amanda: Wow, it's like worse than golf.
Peter B: Right. Imagine it literally every time I'm watching this thing I'm like, what if I was [00:13:00] standing right there watching and then all of a sudden it's like boom. Everyone's gone. You're like
Amanda: All done for the day
Peter B: for the whole day Yeah. So it's a, it's a spectacle for sure. Listen, in my opinion, it is literally the greatest test of any athlete in any sport for endurance and just overall like mind over matter. It is all willpower. All the time and I can tell by your face like maybe that's not enough for you to watch yet Which I can appreciate since we don't all share the same perspective amanda and that's fine and i'm learning to grow so Just for you. It's also a really cool way to see some of the most iconic and prettiest parts of france And all the castles and small towns and cool farms and really just all of french You Culture.
Amanda: I mean that's something I can get on board with so you're telling me that if I watch it on TV I'll be able to see all of the castles.
Peter B: You're gonna look they're gonna teach you the narrators that I guess announcers They know more about French culture than anybody Anybody. [00:14:00] That's all. They don't talk about the race. They talk about when the castles were built, who was, who inhabited the castles, how they used to live the life back. It is amazing to watch.
Amanda: So I'll just get a little sort of sophisticated while listening, huh?
Peter B: Yes. All right. That is absolutely, with a little bike race thrown in.
Amanda: I like it. I like it. But how many riders and teams are there?
Peter B: Okay, so there's roughly 20 teams now.
Amanda: And do they all ride together?
Peter B: They all ride together, yes. Uh, except for one day, but anyway. Um, and each of them have eight riders. So, 20 times 8, it's about 160 riders that compete in the race. I don't, I don't, it might be 21 teams, but
Amanda: And compete, like they all
Peter B: They're all going for glory.
Amanda: And they're all together.
Peter B: They're all together, they're all going, they start at the same time and set, yes.
Amanda: Yeah, I feel like the domino effect could take place here.
Okay, I'm gonna have to watch, but I need some lingo so, lay it on me.
Peter B: All right, good idea. For all you virgins jumping into the world of cycling, you gotta learn lingo.
Here's a few quick ones. Okay, so first we have the Peloton, people. The Peloton.
Amanda: The stationary bike. And that's what you're going to start with?
Peter B: Um, wrong. That, like, [00:15:00] came like a hundred years after.
Amanda: Huh?
Peter B: Yeah. So the Peloton is actually the giant squirming mass of riders.
Amanda: Oh, what we were just talking about.
Peter B: Yeah. Like, well, I guess, the cyclists, really. Like, riding together in what looks like, I guess, a school of sardines.
Amanda: Okay. Yes.
Peter B: It's, it's the whole huge group.
Amanda: Huh, I never knew it actually had a name, clearly, as we were just talking about it. And you didn't even call it a peloton then?
Peter B: Yeah, well, because I knew that I was going to teach you what a peloton was.
Amanda: Oh, okay, fair, fair, fair. So then why is it called
Peter B: a peloton? So it is called a peloton from the French word for little ball or platoon. Or even maybe group.
Amanda: Also, it just still seems so dangerous.
Peter B: So, I used to think it was really dangerous. But staying in a group like that, like, helps riders save a ton of energy by drafting behind each other.
And it is way safer than you think to be in a group than it is to be alone.
Amanda: Interesting.
Peter B: Okay, so then we have something called the general classification. You'll hear that a lot, while you're listening. The GC, they abbreviate it. Uh, so each rider's finishing time is [00:16:00] collected after a day's stage.
And the general classification is just the term for sorting those riders according to their cumulative time. Plus or minus any bonus or penalties. Way too sophisticated. So the better the rider, the lower the GC. That's sort of the name they give to like the best rider on each team that's really contending for first place.
So each team, well most teams, have what they call a GC rider, or a General Classification Rider that they all work with to help protect and ensure that they have like the best chance of winning, not only the stages, but ultimately the whole race. So you're going to hear the term a lot, the GC rider. That means like the best, the all star of your group.
Yep.
Amanda: Okay, got it.
Peter B: Yep. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, then you have like all the different roles that the riders play on their respective teams
Amanda: Wait, they do different things. They all just don't race.
Peter B: They all race, but they all have different jobs So the idea is that one person one person wins the Tour de France The team that that person is on also wins.
You win the team race, [00:17:00] but one person wins.
Amanda: So as a team, you know who the best one's going to be, which
Peter B: is your GC. They literally pick, yes, you got it right. So think of soccer, right? You have like strikers or forwards that try to score the goals. You have like the defense or the fullbacks that try to like stop the goals.
You have the goalie. They use their hand. It's like, it's the same thing, right? They're all just different positions. So the GC rider we just talked about, his job literally to win the race. Then you have the domestique. Is the name.
Amanda: The what?
Peter B: The domestique. In my opinion, the totally unsung hero.
Like, the drummer and bassist of a band that, keep the whole frickin song together but get no credit. Like, the engine room man. These guys fetch water bottles for the trainers, they block the wind for the GC rider, they chase down the breakaways. A
Amanda: breakaway?
Peter B: The breakaways. Yeah. Yeah when some riders, like.
Like, at the beginning, when you were talking about the P, like, if somebody takes off in front of the whole peloton.
Yeah, the domestique's job is to sort of chase them down, right? For sure. They, like, they basically do everything, right? They sacrifice their own chances of winning to help the GC win.
Amanda: [00:18:00] They're doing it for the greater good.
Peter B: Greater good. They're like the ultimate wingman
Amanda: like it.
Peter B: Then you have the Sprinter.
Amanda: Okay.
Peter B: The sprinter, baby. Yeah.
Amanda: Not running.
Peter B: Nope. No, no, no. The sprinter. So, a lot of teams have them, some don't. But, the sprinter's job is to win on, like, the flat stages with their
Amanda: Oh, okay. So, kind of like a sprinter running.
Yes, yes, yes. Right? Because there's mountain stages. There's flat stages. It's like, there's all different sort of terrain. You with me? Yep. So like on the flat stages, you want your sprinter who has like ridiculous bursts of speed over very short distances.
'cause their legs are like freaking tree trunks. They are huge. Um, and they can also win points at a sprint stage. So it's important to have a sprinter on your team to win certain parts.
Okay. You're gonna have to loop back around to the staging thing, but I feel
Peter B: I'm still, I'm still in vocab mode.
I'll, I'll loop back. Okay. I'll loop back.
Amanda: But I do feel like I'm getting it a little bit where it's like utility knives, right? There's different knives in there for what you need.
Peter B: You make this so perfect.
Amanda: But eventually it will add in points and we'll figure out how.
Peter B: It'll all come together. And we're going to cook, we're going to cook whatever we're cooking with the utility. Perfect. [00:19:00] Yes. Let's go. Okay. Finally, you have the lead out rider.
Amanda: Okay. I can't even guess what a lead out rider is. What is it? It's like a grand marshal of a parade or something.
Peter B: Yeah. Okay. Sure. Um, no. It's not like that because each team has one so it's not like what there's not like one lead out right of
Amanda: grand marshal of their team.
Peter B: Okay, wow, this is gonna be hard. Okay, so first you have this thing called a sprint train, where basically your team lines up as it gets close to, important parts of the race. Like, either the race finish, or a sprint location that I'll explain later. And they guide the sprinter through all sorts of chaos.
And then the back of that sprint train is the lead outrider. , let me explain like this, his job is to guide the sprinter through that insane, final 100 meters or so and shield the sprinter from the wind till the last possible second and leave the sprinter in the best position to win. So you have eight guys that are lined up and they're racing really fast, right?
The seventh guy is the lead out rider. The eighth guy is the sprinter. Okay. And each one peels off at a different time. So as they're getting closer to the finish line, [00:20:00] the first guy peels off the earliest. Then the second guy keeps riding hard. He peels off. The third guy, the train's getting shorter.
Fourth guy, fifth guy, sixth guy. The seventh guy, that lead out rider, will take his sprinter, the eighth guy, like literally to the last second. And then he peels off and the sprinter goes in. Nuts. I mean, these guys are like 60, 70 miles out. They're flying as fast as they can to win the race. It is insane.
That's what the lead out rider's job is.
Amanda: I am still a little confused. Doesn't the team want the GC rider to win or the sprinter to win?
Peter B: Okay. These are good questions. And I'm understanding why the Tour de France is very complicated. The answer is both.
Amanda: Yeah, no, no, I'm more confused.
Peter B: Okay. Don't be. It's easy.
Stay with me. And we're going to, we're going to get this done. We're going to get this done in 40 minutes, one way or the other. Okay. So the actual race is made up of 21 stages. And each stage is a hundred miles or so. And there's like a few time trial stages thrown in, but that's way too sophisticated for this podcast.
So we're going to skip that. So the idea here is that truly each team wants their GC rider to win, but it got really boring just to watch a [00:21:00] bunch of guys ride towards the finish line. A hundred miles away just to race for the last few minutes or so. Imagine that 97 miles, everybody's just racing next to each other.
And then three miles off a sudden, that was so stupid. So there's tour de France association people or whoever, I don't even know. They got together and came up with some pretty clever ways to Make it like way more fun to watch. So the 21 stages are made up of like flat stages, hilly stages, mountain stages, maybe a time trial stage or two, some combo stages.
And depending on the stage, each team maps out what they're trying to accomplish for that stage or that day. Because. Everybody already sort of knows, for the most part, how they stack up against the competition. Like, there's only 160 riders in this race. They like, know who's the best in the world.
They know who's the second best in the world. They know who the 38th best person in the world is. They know everybody. So, it's sort of like, the Dodgers and the Yankees are playing the Pittsburgh Pirates or something like that. Like, nobody competes with Dodger or Yankee payroll. So, you just do your best.
But like, 8 out of 10 times, you pretty much can predict the outcome. Okay? So, the same is true for any of the Tour de France teams. So, they [00:22:00] all know who the best riders are. And who has the best GCs. So they're really playing for these points. Or the younger riders are getting prepped for future years .
They sort of have a good sense.
Amanda: So they're all just playing for second place.
Peter B: Yes. Yeah. Yes. I don't want to say it quite that way, but yeah. The idea is they're all playing for like a bigger strategy at some future state. Yeah. For sure.
Amanda: So, when does the fun come in?
Peter B: Okay. Okay. Okay. You got it. Okay. So basically they have like four ways to win stuff and each one comes with its like, own special colored jersey.
So everyone knows you won or are winning at any point in the race. So, first, the yellow jersey. That's like the best jersey you've probably heard of. Have you heard of the yellow jersey?
Amanda: No, I just remember Lance Armstrong.
Peter B: Okay, the yellow jersey. Yeah, so the yellow jersey is for the GC riders fighting to win the whole thing.
And whoever's leading the race at any given time or any given stage by having the lowest number of minutes ridden so far wears that yellow jersey for that stage. So whoever wins the first stage puts on the yellow shirt. Nobody has it the first stage. Once the first stage is over, whoever won wears the yellow.
After the second stage, whoever is leading by [00:23:00] time Whoever has the lowest time in the first and second stage combined, now wears the yellow jersey. Same for the third stage, same, so it's, it's, it's always up to date. The yellow jersey is always up to date. It's the leader of the race, like, currently happening.
Amanda: Basically, the yellow jersey symbolizes, I'm the best, right now, and everyone is just along for the ride.
Peter B: Yes. Okay. Absolutely. I mean, people are trying to, of course, beat him, but yes. Okay. Then here's where it gets fun. So then you have the green jersey. This one's for the sprinters that we talked about.
This one's given to the rider who's the fastest over flat sections and intermediate sprints. So you get points for crossing the finish line the fastest, but also, somewhere in the middle of each stage, at a predetermined point, there's also a race inside the race. Okay. So, the sprinters have two chances of winning. The intermediate sprint, and the end of the race. And because the sprinters typically don't make it to the end of the race, like, they get to the end, but not in first place a lot of times, because if there's a mountain stage, it's impossible.
They make sure that the intermediate sprint [00:24:00] is somewhere pretty easy to get to, and you can win a massive amount of points. So the whole idea of the sprinters, they're in their own race every day, racing for points to be able to wear the green jersey. And then at the end, you are the fastest sprinter and you win a lot of prize money.
So there is a sort of a separate race going on for the green jersey inside the bigger yellow jersey race. Make sense?
Amanda: Mostly
Peter B: these are not the GC riders, right? These aren't right. These are like,
Amanda: I mean, the green jersey's just like another, like, woo, look at me. I'm number one. Yeah, these are the treat one.
Peter B: These are the guys with the tree trunk legs that are awesome. Right? They have jobs to do in other stages of the race, but for the most part, their job is to win all sprints whenever they can. Okay. Then you have the polka dot jersey sometimes referred to as the king of the mountain jersey, and that's given to the best climber.
Amanda: And it's based on points, just like the green jersey?
Peter B: Totally, but basically each mountaintop has a point designation along with it. And if you get there first, you get the most points. Oh. So depending on how high the mountain is, they'll give you two points. [00:25:00] If it's a really high mountain, maybe you get ten points, whatever it is.
Whoever has the most climb points accumulated wears the polka dot jersey for that stage. Okay, make sense? So same things going on. We got the green jersey, yellow jersey, polka dot jersey. Then finally of the white jersey, which is called the best young rider jersey. And it's the same as yellow jersey, but you just have to be under the age of 26 during the race year.
So it's like a way to keep an eye on all the up and comers. So if you're winning the white jersey, let's say that a 21 year old rider is like not good enough to win the Tour de France, but he's like pretty good. beating all the other riders under the age of 26, a lot of people got their eye on him.
Because in the next few years, that guy's going to be awesome. So you want to win, if you're younger, you want to be winning the white jerseys.
Amanda: What's the average age?
Peter B: That's a good question. I don't know. I would guess somewhere about late 20s, maybe 30. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think they raised the oldest guys racing are probably like 35, 36 and they're sort of racing out.
Amanda: I think I like this now. It kind of gives me a little bit more reason to watch and it does make it a little bit more fun where it's not just like watching bikers all in a pack. But are there any other terms I need to know?
Peter B: Uh, I don't know. [00:26:00] Not really. I guess the race officials. They're called, I think, I don't know how to say it, commissi, commissiars, commissiares, I don't know, it's a French word. They're not referees, they're commissaires, I think they say commissaires. Um, there's some other French words, too, they throw in, like, echelon and barre d'or.
These are, like, fancy terms for, different, people. People and or positions. It's a way too sophisticated way too sophisticated. Okay. Whoa Wait, there is one more. It's called the grand depart the start of the race The beginning of
it all maybe so since the 1950s the Grand Depart has typically taken place in a different town each year, but since the 70s, they changed it up and started awarding it to a different city outside of France each year as a way of increasing international interest, which I think is amazing.
So when the race starts, it doesn't start in
France and it hasn't for 50 years.
Amanda: But now I gotta know, where is it this year?
Peter B: Florence, Italy.
Amanda: Oh, interesting.
Peter B: I know. Right. So then you get the Italians that are super excited, and they come out to watch the race. Yeah, [00:27:00] totally cool.
Amanda: I mean, that's one way to market.
All right. So now that I know all the lingo, now I want to know how they strategize. Like obviously there has to be, cause there's all these different players, and then how do they win?
You got to put it all together. Nice little package.
Peter B: I'm going to try.
Amanda: Okay.
Peter B: I'm going to try. So basically like winning the tour revolves around keeping that GC contender in the best shape to give him the best chance to win each stage or place up high enough in the standings consistently. So by the end of the tour, they have the lowest time.
And to do this, you need all your teammates, like I already explained. Everybody's got to do the job. And all the jobs are totally planned out in advance by the coach, trainers, and all the riders who sit in cars behind the riders and talk to them the whole race in their headsets, telling them what's going on in real time, making sure the riders on their team are all okay, like, everybody's doing their job right.
They all plan on how to support their GC. And how the GC can gain time on each stage, and where they can chill and save energy if they're winning.
Amanda: When you say gain time, you [00:28:00] mean not gain time.
Peter B: Uh, yeah, I said that, that is, that is a little deceiving, isn't it? Um, how they can
Amanda: Like cut time.
Peter B: Gain time against their competitor.
Right, like their competitor is going to take longer. Right. So they're going to say that a lot. They're going to say gain time, but it means against their competitor, have a bigger gap. And each tour every year has some specific key stages that make or break the whole race for the riders.
Usually these are the highest mountain summits. And the individual time trials, and these stages are the ones that give, the GC massive time gains over their other contenders, or put more space in between the time between that make sense? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Domestique set the pace, and also sort of shield from crashes, because they're out in front. The climbers are the ones who lead their GCs up all the climbs. The lead out men protect the GC from wind, or just let them draft when they're tired. And some of the other guys try to control the pace of the whole peloton, so they sort of try to control the whole race, basically [00:29:00] keeping everyone on their heels, so to speak.
And then during like the really hard stages, the idea is to set a faster than comfortable pace for your opponents so they're too tired to attack, or to launch your team's own attack to gain time. There's a lot of strategy and sophistication going on, and they're planning all this out in advance.
So much shit can happen that you always have to be ready for anything, especially weather changes, because that happens a ton. I mean, you're going a hundred miles. There's a lot of weather. Unexpected attacks from opponents, crashes are a huge part of the race, cramps, fan interference, like, all sorts of shit happens.
Amanda: I mean, I heard about a lady a few years ago that made the whole Peloton crash because she held up a sign, which is why I was talking about a domino effect.
Peter B: Yes, yes, it did. That was that German lady, and she was, she, they wanted her to go to jail for like four months. By the way, that's a classic story. So she held up the sign, right?
Out in like middle of the race and the racers, like ran into the sign and they all crashed 180 riders all went down. This lady hid for four days. She like literally hid. They couldn't find her anywhere. Then they finally found her. Then they prosecuted her. She had to pay like, I [00:30:00] don't remember, like 15, 000 and they wanted her to go to jail for four months.
She has, Every, every bit of PTSD, like imaginable. She's completely wrecked her whole life because of that. She feels terrible and it's, it's a super sad story. But
Amanda: does she intentionally step out with her sign?
Peter B: No, but I'm just going to, I'm just going to call it what it is. She was an absolute idiot.
She like leaned out with a sign to get the sign on television and as the writers were going by and they ran right into it, it was the dumbest. It was, it was a big L move, like big L move. Um, but then also like a few years before that, I remember on one of the mountain stages. Some a holes like through thumbtacks all over the course and awful Yeah, and these guys went through it 50 miles an hour popping tires everywhere crashing out.
Yes, like really dangerous stuff Like people are assholes sometimes and and they have to ride through this Like, they got to figure all this out. It's really crazy.
Amanda: If they figure it all out and they get to the end kind of unscathed, does it really come down to the last day?
Peter B: [00:31:00] No way. No, no, no, no.
Almost never. No, it's usually wrapped up like the day before or a few days before. The last day is usually a celebration. So even though, they aren't even really racing on the last day. They're literally just touring through Paris. The fans are all taking it in, they're even drinking champagne, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Amanda: Their victory lap.
Peter B: Yeah, it is. But I suppose, like, if it was a really, really close race by the last day, of course it would come down the last day, but typically it's not. You usually make or break the race, like, during one of those final mountain stages in the Alps, where, there's enough time separation, I mean, a whole minute or two or five between, first and second place, and there's, like, no chance to gain on the last day.
Amanda: Got it.
Wow. So, this has been very eye opening, and I think I'm starting to understand there is way more strategy involved than I think anyone could have ever imagined.
Peter B: A ton. A ton. A ton.
Amanda: So, I guess I'm kind of hooked, and I'm going to watch it.
But, before I do, you know I need my fun facts. So I can impress my friends and convince them to do a watch party with me.
Peter B: You're doing a watch party?
Amanda: I mean, I did it with T20.
Peter B: Can I come? Can I come to your watch party?
Okay, if I came to your watch [00:32:00] party, I would make it. First of all, I'd probably be obnoxious, but I would explain everything to everybody.
I promise.
Amanda: But I also need to know like what day to watch because I feel like I can't do
21 days.
Peter B: You got it day one watch party because it's just fun So it doesn't even matter and like everything it's no holes barred. You don't even know who's gonna win You don't so day one for sure and then I will tell you there is one other stage You need to watch this year specifically a little bit further down.
Okay, so a lot of fun facts loaded ready
Amanda: Let's go.
Peter B: Okay, so normal race length today is about 2, 500 miles the shortest one was the first one at 1, 500 miles, we stated earlier. But the longest race ever was in 1926. It was 3, 570 miles long.
Amanda: That's insane.
Peter B: That's all the way across North America, man.
Like from Mexico City to freaking like Anchorage, Alaska, all on a rickety piece of shit bike. Totally nuts. Crazy. Number two. The average amount of calories each rider needs to consume over the course of three weeks is 125, 000 [00:33:00] calories. That's 6, 000 calories per day just to maintain their weight.
So they really probably need more like 8, 000 or so calories to like live.
Amanda: Wow.
Peter B: Yeah. A day. That's insane.
Amanda: And eating while on the bike.
Peter B: Yeah, put me on a bike, baby. I'd love to eat 8, 000 calories a day.
Amanda: How do you eat on the bike? I don't think I do. They eat on the bike.
Peter B: They eat on the bike all the time.
They are, yes. Dude, I could get so into it. We can go from sorta sophisticated to totally sophisticated. We need another hour. Alright, number three. Over 3. 5 billion people Tune in to watch this every year. You heard me 3. 5 billion people. That is almost half of the world, and it only trails the World Cup.
Amanda: That's crazy.
Peter B: Yes, it is. It's amazing. Number four, more than 800 tires get used over the three week race. That's roughly six tires per rider. I was telling you how they pop all that. Absolutely. They're blowing through tires. It's crazy.
Amanda: And they have a little mechanic that's like.
Peter B: Oh, every, every team has [00:34:00] their own mechanic.
And every team brings, their own bikes. I'll explain. Okay, number five. The first winner of the Tour de France was Maurice Gagrin. Gagrin. I don't know how to speak French, but that's who he was. And, uh, fun fact here, he repeated the next year in 1904, but was disqualified. Yes, one year into the Tour de France, we already had disqualifications.
Uh, they found out he took a train through the Alps and then got on, uh, a new bike.
Amanda: That's kind of cheating.
Peter B: Yeah, uh, totally. So, um, disqual won in 1903, disqualified in 1904.
Amanda: I feel like, did he cheat in 1903 too?
Peter B: Yay Maurice, probably. But, but, I mean, who knows. How many people were racing that way?
Twelve. And, and probably eleven of them were criminals. Okay. number six. The most stages won by a single rider is thirty four. Not like win the Tour de France wins. I mean stages of the Tour de France. Uh, it's a tie between the famous Belgian, Eddy Merck. Greatest freaking racer of all time and just accomplishing the feat in 2021, the Englishman Mark Cavendish at the ripe old age of 36.
[00:35:00] So one of the, one of the oldest riders and he was in it. I want to say last year, he was going for, he was trying to break the record. He was going to go for stage 35, and he crashed out of the race on stage 8, so he couldn't race anymore after stage 8, which was super sad, because everybody was rooting for him to, like, beat Eddie Merck, but
Amanda: Is he going to race this year?
Peter B: No, he can't. No, I think he's too old now. I don't think he's racing anymore. He's done. Okay, number 7. The fastest tour ever completed was just under, like, 80 hours of ride time. I don't know what that is. Four days, like consecutively days, right? So, so the difference between first and second place is usually like minutes.
It's not seconds. Right? But in 1989, the American Greg LeMond defeated Lorraine Fignon by only eight seconds overall. So back to your whole like, can it come down to the last day? That day, it was coming down to the last second. They were racing for the finish line. I've never
Amanda: Talk about
winning by a nose.
Peter B: Yes. Right. I've never seen anything like that. usually everyone, I, because I started watching in, like, I don't know, 2005. It's like minutes. Like, you, the, the last days, [00:36:00] nobody's been paying attention. Right? So that must have been crazy in, like, 1989, for sure. Number eight. In the 1920s, competitors shared cigarettes while racing.
They were just smoking right there on the bikes because at that time, riders believed that smoking helped open up the lungs in preparation for the mountain climbs. Yeah, I just don't really help them open up the lungs. I think it was. I don't think that's what was really happening to their lungs at all.
So anyway, I don't believe they use that practice anymore. Now they find different ways of doping. Okay, well, number nine. And finally, Alcohol was consumed during the race because it was believed to ease or numb any pain of the riders during the race. It was banned in 1960 when they figured out it, uh, wasn't really true after all and the riders were just getting hammered.
Amanda: Talk about the original form of doping. Right?
Peter B: Classic let's go, right? Alcohol. All right. Um, that's all I got. Fun facts out.
Amanda: All right. I love it. You know, fun facts are the best part of this whole podcast. So I do appreciate those. Do we have anything [00:37:00] else? Are we going to wrap it up?
Peter B: No, that's all I got for today. Hopefully I convinced you it's worth tuning in and watching.
Amanda: You did. I'm excited. I'm in, let's go.
Peter B: All right, well, hopefully you feel like you got the inside scoop on what it takes to conquer the Tour de France. Whether you're dreaming or racing or just cheering from the couch, remember, it's all about teamwork, tactics, and a shit ton of pedaling and leg lube, baby.
Amanda: Oh my god, Pete, you're killing me.
Peter B: Leg lube.
Amanda: What is leg lube?
Peter B: It's all about leg lube.
Amanda: You held back leg lube.
Peter B: No, you gotta put the, you gotta, it's the chafing cream. You gotta get it all in all the cracks.
Amanda: That would have been a good fun fact. Yeah. What would have been a better fun fact if you knew how much leg lube they used?
Peter B: I don't know how much leg lube they used. That would have, they used 106 pounds of leg lube. I have no idea.
Amanda: All right. Well then, so then what do I need to know and remember from this podcast that's going to make me sort of sophisticated to my fellow humans?
Peter B: All right, let's go. First, uh, get Peacock and set it to record all 21 stages of the Tour de France, uh, unless you want to wake up every morning at 4. 30 and start watching like [00:38:00] I do.
Um, which I don't think a lot of people want to. But so for cheaters, you can also watch the recap of the day's stage on YouTube in like 20 minutes every night. Or even for worse cheaters, Just follow the tour on Instagram and make sure you know each stage winner and the overall leader and who's in second at any given Time so you sort of seem mildly relevant.
Amanda: All right, that that's what I'm gonna do.
Peter B: You're gonna see the last one Yep, why don't you I have an idea? Why don't you just call me every night? We'll talk for five minutes I'll give you the download.
Amanda: Okay good.
Peter B: Okay second. I would do a little research on the upcoming tour So like I'd probably get to know the names of the top five contenders and also which country the Grand Depart is going to be in
Amanda: Florence, Italy this year.
Peter B: Oh, look at you, all sophisticated. I listened. It's also good to know a little something about the city that the Grand Apart is in. Like, did you know that Florence was once the capital of Italy, and now it's just the capital of Tuscany? Did you know it's where Gucci is from? Or that it is the birthplace of the piano?
Amanda: Huh. Nope.
Peter B: And it was also the first Italian city to pave [00:39:00] its streets. How do you like that? I mean, Florence be rockin And it's got, uh, It's got Statue of David and his little peenie, right? So there you know, you know something about that. That's you need to know about the grand apart. Okay
Amanda: but who are the five contenders then?
Peter B: Oh the five contenders. Let's go. Okay. So jonah's vindicard from denmark He's he's like my favorite so he won the last two tours back to back. And then you have tadej pogaca from Slovenia and he won the two before that so that's like the race is really between those two. So 2020 Tadej and then 22 and 23 it was Jonas Vindigo.
Amanda: So this is like the tiebreaker.
Peter B: Yeah yeah this is big. Okay and then you have Remco Evenpal from Belgium. He's awesome. Primoz Roglic. He is amazing from Slovenia. He has not won yet but he is awesome and could win at any moment. And finally, Carlos Rodriguez rounding out the top five from Spain. They're all awesome. you They all can win this year. You don't have to know a lot about them, but it's good to know their names. So like, when you hear, you'll hear them a lot if you're watching.
I would also look up the hardest stage, so you know whoever wins that stage is probably gonna win the [00:40:00] tour. And so remember earlier when you were like, so what stage do I watch? You watch stage one and stage 19 this year, people. It's from OHA to IZOLA. I want to say, I want to say that right. IZOLA 2000. That's a ski resort. So from OMHA to IZOLA 2000, it's got three massive climbs all over 6, 000 feet and one as high as 8, 500 feet. It's going to be nuts for sure. Like this is like climbing to big bear. Three times in four hours.
Amanda: That's crazy,
Peter B: right? Yeah. No, this is what's going to this will be the make or break
Amanda: And there's like this one guy that says that's his specialty
Peter B: The GC is going to win them out the mountain stage Ends up being won by the GC So it's interesting because they start in hilly stages and in the hilly stages the king of the mountain climbers They they win like they put those out in front They do a lot of the points and start to and get in the polka dot jersey But by the end like in the Alps when it's the serious big climbs the GC riders will blow by thousands [00:41:00] Anyone else that's how good they are.
Yes. So so it's sort of weird But like by the race the yellow jersey generally also wins the polka dot jersey.
Amanda: Huh?
Peter B: It's yeah, it's a little weird okay. So now that you're armed with all that, basically, when you're at the office next time, talking about sports, ask a co worker if they watched any sports last weekend, and then listen and care a little bit about their specific passion.
Then, when it's your turn, tell them you've been fascinated with the Tour de France recently. And that you're watching the race.
Amanda: But probably make sure it's somewhere around June, July, or else you're going to look like a total idiot.
Peter B: Um, totally good point. Otherwise, yes, you look just kind of out of sorts. And then finally share these interesting and relevant details to seem sort of sophisticated. The Tour de France started in 1903 as a stunt to help a newspaper boost its circulation. The race covers roughly 2, 500 miles over the course of 23 days, with a rest day or two thrown in, which translates to more than 100 miles of riding per day.
Number three, the riders use different bikes depending on the terrain for the day, mountain, flat, or time trial. Each rider brings four to [00:42:00] five bikes to the tour, ready to go. Number four, four men have won the Tour de France five times each. Jacques Anctil was the first one, Frenchman. Eddy Merck, we talked about him, from Belgium. Bernard Hinault, from France. And then, most recently, Miguel Indurain from Spain. He did it in the 90s. Number five, the route changes every year, with the Grand Depart taking place in a different country other than France. But the bulk of the race is run through France. And yes, some years are totally harder than other years.
And finally, don't ever mention Lance Armstrong unless you know your shit. He's too polarizing in the cycling world after getting stripped of all seven of his Tour de France victories for juicing during the early 2000s.
Amanda: All seven?
Peter B: Seven in a row.
Amanda: And they said, just kidding.
Peter B: He was
Amanda: You were doping the whole time.
Peter B: You either love him or hate him, and I hate him. So like, you just, how do you
Amanda: [00:43:00] So that means the Americans have never won then.
Peter B: Uh, Greg LeMond. Okay. Yeah. So he was back in the 80s. Greg LeMond was amazing. Uh, and then Lance just sort of blew it.
Amanda: And there you have it, dear listeners. Thank you for riding along with us while we learned all about the most prestigious cycling race in history, the Tour de France.
And all you need to do to win is assemble a team of superhumans, pedal like your life depends on it, and never ever forget your sunscreen. Whether you're drafting behind your teammates, climbing mountains that would make a mountain goat think twice. Or downing energy gels like they're going out of style.
It's all part of the grand spectacle that turns mere mortals into lycra clad legends. We'd like to think we've shared just enough information to make you either a flaming nuisance or a little more sophisticated to your fellow humans. Well, sort of. Until next time, keep those wheels spinning, your water bottles full, and your tire pumps at the ready. Catch you on the flip side of the Peloton. And if you enjoyed this episode and found it particularly interesting, don't forget to subscribe. Leave a review and share with your peeps. Until next time, stay curious and [00:44:00] stay inspired.
